A few years ago, I attended a session that should have been inspiring. The speakers were polished, professional, and well-prepared. And yet, I left with only one vivid memory: a blur of sameness. Everyone sounded the same, looked the same, and spoke in the same cadence - they even used the same gestures. It was a masterclass in mediocrity—not because the speakers weren’t skilled, but because they weren’t themselves.
That moment clarified something I’ve believed ever since:
The best speakers are unapologetically unique and authentic.
They embrace their quirks, lean into their strengths, and make us feel something unforgettable. In a world of polished avatars, we crave humanity—flaws and all.
Photo by Y K on Unsplash
Here’s how to find your unique speaking style and turn it into your greatest asset:
1. Discover What Makes You Unique
Your unique traits aren’t quirks—they’re your superpowers. Whether it’s an accent, a distinctive rhythm in your speech, or an unconventional storytelling approach, these elements make you memorable.
For me, speaking in German can still sometimes be a challenge. When I can’t find the perfect word, I’ll slip in an English one or creatively rephrase my explanation in German. And guess what? It works. Not because it’s flawless but because it’s authentic. Even better, it often sparks engagement—audience members lean in, offer suggestions, and help shape the conversation so everyone understands. Smiles ripple through the room, and I make it a point to thank them for their support graciously. It turns a moment of imperfection into a shared experience.
Ask yourself:
What do people compliment me on when I speak?
When have I felt most connected to an audience?
What story do I most love to share, and why does it resonate so deeply with me?
These answers will lead you to the heart of your unique voice. Embrace the answers. Your audience isn’t looking for perfection; they’re looking for connection.
2. Be Fully Present
The secret to being comfortable on stage isn’t just preparation but presence. If you are present and in the moment you will see the opportunities each situation offers to connect with your audience.
I once found myself in an unexpected situation: during my first week at a new job, I was invited to a meeting where I thought my role was to observe. To my surprise, I was asked to give a speech on the spot. For a moment, panic crept in, but I took a deep breath and reminded myself to treat it like a conversation. After all, my goal that day was to observe and learn—and those same qualities make a speaker relatable and engaging. One question stood out: “What’s been your most surprising observation so far?” It caught me off guard but gave me the perfect opening to share something meaningful. Since then, I’ve prepared for that question regularly—it’s a powerful prompt that encourages introspection and often sparks deep, insightful connections.
Here’s why it worked: I had practiced impromptu speaking in low-stakes settings and spent years observing other great speakers. When the stakes were high, I leaned on that experience. The first takeaway? Say yes to every chance to speak—even in casual group discussions. The second? Authenticity always wins. By showing up as my true self, I found it easier to navigate the unexpected. And the third? Practice is everything. Preparation builds the confidence to turn surprises into opportunities, whether it’s a formal speech or a spontaneous moment.
3. Master the Art of Storytelling
Stories are the bridge between your authenticity and your audience. A great story doesn’t need to be grand; it needs to be authentic. Share a mistake you’ve made, a lesson you’ve learned, or a success that felt impossible.
If you’re not sure where to start, ask yourself:
When did I feel challenged but overcome the odds?
What moment taught me a lesson I’ll never forget?
What story makes people laugh or lean in when I tell it?
What personal trait or habit do others often compliment or find memorable about me?
How have I approached a situation differently from others, and what impact did it have?
Better yet, leverage AI tools to uncover and shape compelling stories. Start by prompting AI with something like: “You are a storytelling coach. Please ask me questions to help uncover a moment I can use in my upcoming talk about (content) for an audience of (describe your audience).” Use its questions and suggestions to jog your memory or explore ideas you hadn’t considered. Once you’ve identified key moments, take it further and ask, “How can I turn this experience into a relatable and inspiring narrative for my audience?” The result will be a polished, engaging story that showcases your authenticity and deeply resonates with your listeners.
4. Get Comfortable With Being Uncomfortable
After a hopefully rejuvenating winter break, I encourage you to embrace moments of discomfort in 2025—those stretches between comfort and challenge where growth truly happens. Think about it: Do your proudest moments result from doing the same thing every day? Or do they come from stepping beyond your comfort zone and rising to the occasion? It’s the latter. This year, make it a goal to say yes to some slightly intimidating speaking opportunities. Each time you step into that space, the boundary between comfort and challenge will shift, and with it, your confidence, resilience, and ability to tackle new difficulties will grow. That’s where the magic of progress lies.
Here’s the truth: audiences won’t remember slide 12 or bullet point 4. They will remember how you made them feel—whether you inspired, connected with, or made them feel seen. And even more importantly, you’ll remember how you felt about yourself: confident, authentic, and proud of stepping into your unique voice.
Your voice is already one of a kind. Now, it’s time to embrace it and let it shine.
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